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Humor

Fun With Hockey Name Verbs

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Kronwall’s gonna Kronwall.

So the chant “You got Kronwalled” apparently made the rounds yesterday during the Ducks-Red Wings game. (I wouldn’t know…I was busy having 16,000 heart attacks at the Blues-Kings Game 6.)

But Kronwalled sounds like a pretty legit hockey verb. It’s catchy. It’s to the point. You say someone’s getting Kronwalled, you know that person’s having a long night and will need a truck of ice tomorrow. I like it. That prompted a discussion between myself and hockey-loving friend Shane:

Is there a better hockey name verb than Kronwalled?

We stuck with defensemen first.

Doughtyed? (Me: “Getting Doughtyed sounds like a horrible medical condition.”

Clutterbucked? (Shane: “That sounds like a frat initiation task.”)

Latandressed? (Cue fit of laughter, then me saying, “That sounds like a failed hockey move, like a Devin Setoguchi-like shootout fail.”)

OK, so maybe Kronwalled wins. But then the game became hockey name verbs in general, and well, the game got really fun:

“THAT WAS A CHEAP SHOT! He just snuck up behind him, and totally Bertuzzied him.”

“You just got McSorleyed, bro.”

“Ooooo, that does not look good, the elbow came up and he got Lindrossed hard.”

“Hand that man a towel, he got Laperriered in the face,”

“He skates in, shoots, and Maliks to win the game in a shootout!”

“Ugh, the goalie just Nabokoved that into his own net.”

“Oh man, he just Tureked that shot from centre ice!”

“He almost Jonathan Quicked that.” (Actual thing I said about Brian Elliott sometime during the Kings-Blues series.)

And, a golden contribution from the ever awesome @chrissampang:

“I Cloutiered my way to rural Idaho.”

Play the game! Tell us some of your favorites in the comments!

(Psst, you can follow Jenn on Twitter to see if she’ll suffer 20,000 more heart attacks during the playoffs.)

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About Jenn

Former sports hack, current web geek, forever sports fanatic. I had a nasty habit in middle school of beating up boys who taunted me. You can find me on Twitter at @jrosebud, or read non-hockey musings at therebelstate.net.

Discussion

4 thoughts on “Fun With Hockey Name Verbs

  1. I “Patrick Kane’d” that.
    On ice: refers to sick shootout moves
    Off ice: refers to getting blitzed and acting like a jackass.

    Posted by Karen M | May 11, 2013, 12:19 pm
  2. When goalies go out of the crease I usually yell something like “STOP PRETENDING TO BE MARTY BRODEUR!”

    Posted by batmaneatsbabie | May 11, 2013, 10:46 pm
  3. “You just got McSorleyed, bro.” Has to be our favorite.

    Posted by DiscountHockey | July 23, 2013, 9:18 am
  4. 2112 Hockey Agency is an ice hockey agency in Canada, providing Canadian players with top hockey agents who can help them extend their careers. http://www.2112hockeyagency.com/

    Posted by AHL Player Agency | March 31, 2014, 2:32 pm

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